Tu B'Shvat & William Wilberforce

Say the name of this Jewish holiday out loud & someone may think you have sneezed. God bless you! Though it is little know, it is one of my favorite holidays & would be particularly attractive to all of you eco-friendly folk. Tu B'Shvat is the "Birthday of the Trees" or the celebration of God's incredible creation. I like this day, especially right now, because it is forward thinking. Hopeful. Life-giving. It is a day for eating as many fruits as you can(at least 15! good for detoxing your system. LOL). It is a day for planting trees in honor of your children (cedar for boys & cypress for gils) and the ones who are no longer here with us(or starting seeds in pots if you live in colder climes as we do). Later the branches of your kids' trees may be used to make their wedding canopy (chuppah).

When Jews returned to Israel over 100 years ago, the land was pretty much a swamp. Then people from all over the world began to plant trees in the land via the Jewish National Fund & now there are over 165 million trees in Israel. In just 100 years. You can still plant a tree Eretz Y'srael thru this fund if you like.) This is big change that took time but has very far-reaching long-term effects.

As did the life of William Wilberforce. Yeserday was Martin Luther Kind Day so I watched a movie about a white Englishman from the late 1700s. (Amazing Grace). Why?! The work of Wilberforce & former slave Olaunah Equiano, whose autobiography sold over 50,000 copies, made change that was far-reaching & long term & like the growth of a tree, took MANY years & great perseverance to achieve: Wilberforce, almost singlehandedly, because of his deep & vibrant Christian faith, drove the movement to end all slavery in his day & age. 2007 was the 200th year anniversary of the abolition of slavery in Great Britain. It took many years through incredible obstacles but he & his supporters persisted. One man. One passion. Fueled by the breath of God. Changed the world forever.

And according to the movie, "Amazing Grace" which I highly recommend (pretty kid-friendly too), Wilberforce liked to leave his mansion & sit outside under a tree to talk to (as well as listen to) God. It's where he received much of his inspiration & rehearsed the speeches he would give before the movers & shakers of his day.

FYI: the song "Amazing Grace" is the most well-known song in the world & was written by John Newton, a slave-ship operator for 20 years, who had an encounter with God that changed his life & his politics. "Amazing Grace" was an attempt to express his sorrow & repentance of supporting the slavery of other humans beings. Newton was an inspiration & mentor for William Wilberforce.

Which brings me back to trees. A little story. An old man is planting a tree when a young boy comes along: The boy says, Why waste your time planting a tree? You won't ever get to eat it's fruit. It takes too long to grow. Plant something else like a tomato or flower that you can enjoy this year. The older man said: Well, that is a nice idea & that would be a blessing to us. But I'm planting this tree for my children & my grandchildren & my great grandchildren & all those who will come by this way in the future. I'm not thinking of myself; I'm thinking of them.

Am I thinking of those who will come after me? What kind of "seeds" am I planting? What long term effects will those seeds have? Will my legacy bring good fruit? Shade? Rest? Inspiration? Or will it wither & be gone when my season is over? I think of my husband Bobby who has left many good seeds & much good fruit behind him. A legacy of laughter, creativity, music & deep love.

Some thoughts as the sun rises here in the Northeast USA. Shalom.

Check out the work of the National Underground Freedom Center in Cincinnati, OH, Invisible Children, IRIS Ministries in Israel & Mozambique.

Go set someone free & then plant a tree in their honor!

URGENT prayer for my Dad 1/21/08

I learned to day that he has Stage 4 leakage from his heart valves. He is seeing the docs in Pittsburgh today (January 21). My sister is with him. The meeting is to determine how soon & what type of heart surgery needs to be done. In light of everything happening in our family, we would like a miracle of healing. Not another sad event.

Michael needs....

prayer. He is in deep places of grief & missing Bobby these days. I won't go into detail here because it is his journey & I want to respect his privacy. But please cover him with Abba's love. We begin "The Garden" sessions later today. I pray that God meets us all there.

Death of 2 relationships

Shabbat shalom from home. I was thinking about how with the passing of my husband that another death has occurred: the death of my relationship with God. Are you freaking out? Don't. It is the end of the relationship I had with God before Bobby died. I wouldn't say that I ever had a "Pollyanna" relationship with God expecting to be tiptoeing through the tulips in BLISS all my days, though since I went from a drug-addicted atheist to a very intensely personal & real relationship with my Creator, I had certain expectations of Him. My life has not been easy...not at all. I didn't expect it to be. I've always said that being a believer is the toughest job you'll ever love (like the Marines Holly :). But in my child-like heart, I never imagined anything as painful as losing Bobby being allowed by my Abba. And here it it. Here we are, another bittersweet Shabbes, without his beautiful physical mocha presence. His work-weary smile, harmonizing with me & the kids to sing the blessings & do a "group-hug" & lay his big warm hands on his children's heads (as well as the neighbors' kids if they were there that night & whoever else was joining us for dinner.) Then we usually dug into some wonderful delicacy that he made :)

All of this has brought the death to my relationship with Yeshua, as it was, because of this completely unexpected, unanticipated event in our lives. Why? So many whys? I hold God at arm's length these days yet my spirit clings to His. But He can handle it. He will woo me again. He came to me when I was in a hungover drunken stupor many years, heart hardened, callous & unbelieving & there, in that place, He melted me. I wait for Him to do it again...for the new. For myself. For my children. For tikkun olam. For eternity. With great love.....M.

The Garden Center for grieving children...

The kids & I have joined a support group, which will begin this sunday, called "The Garden." It is a non-profit 501(c)3 organization that focuses on the grieving process for children & teens. We'll be going every other sunday until the end of May. The center uses creative ways to help kids (and their parents) journey through their grieving process. We had our intake interview this morning with the facilitator, Shelly Bathe Lenn. I felt hopeful about the experience. It is helpful to sit with those who are experiencing the same kind of loss. Words aren't adequate & aren't always necessary. The groups are closed in order to foster relationships, a safe place to be & confidentiality & the program runs for 15 sessions sept - may. We "just happened" to connect with them at the time they are letting new families join :) a HUGE THANK YOU to Todd Crossett (Isenberg School of Business Management at UMASS & Key Players project leader) for telling me about this group last week.

The participating families pay what they can, IF they can & no one is turned away because of inability to pay. If you would like to make a donation on behalf of our family, contact Shelly Bathe Lenn at 413 584 7086 ext 124 The operating cost for the program is about $150 per child. Both Michael & Hadassah will participate in groups with their peers. With a grateful heart, Mimi

How Bobby & I met.....

I'm sitting here tonight, wearing a pair of Bobby's jeans that are not as baggy on me as I would hope...feeling a myriad of feelings. Our 12th wedding anniversary would have been this sunday. I have felt the intensity of this time even before being conciously aware of the date, the time, the season.

I first want to say that my wedding was the BEST wedding I've ever attended. I hope all brides can say that :) I had more fun & felt more love, joy & presence of God than at any other gathering of that kind in my life (though the day we celebrated Bobby's life last summer was, amazingly, a close second.) The food seemed supernatural, we danced, we partied, we sang to one another & jammed with our family & best friends...in a blizzard in a country club in Greenville, PA. The maitre'd was healed of some physical ailment during the ceremony (which was also in the country club) & came to us with tears during dinner to tell us so.

Tonight I'm thinking of the way we met: It was 1989 & we both worked for Prime Computer in Natick, MA. I worked in HR; Bobby was in CAD/CAM. We were in completely different buildings. I was very new in my relationship with Yeshua & I was friends with a great bass player named Tom Doran who also worked at Prime. I shared my experiences with God with Tom pretty freely to say the least! One day Tom said to me: Mimi, you've GOT to meet this guy over in Building 10. He's a musician and a "Jesus-Freak" just like you!

So Bobby called my extension (or I called his I can't remember...) & we met for lunch at a little restaurant called "The Villa." Bobby was married at the time so there was nothing romantic in our meeting BUT GOD had Bobby "read my mail" that day. (Many people I know had similar experiences with him). The things he said to me that day opened up a part of my heart that had been very damaged by my own bad choices & what others had done to me. Because of my past,I believed, TRULY, that I did not deserve to have a husband & children. But the day I met Bobby, who knew nothing about me, he spoke into that part of my life & God took over doing the rest.

We became friends & stayed in touch until he & his ex-wife moved to Texas. I didn't have contact with him again until May of 1994 after he had been through a divorce he did not want. BUT GOD had other plans for him...for me...which neither of us could have guessed.

He returned to CT & while there he tracked me down through one of my best friends. I was in Ohio. We talked over the phone for 6 MONTHS! and during that time, God built our friendship into a romance which led to Bobby coming to Ohio..December 1994 & asking me to marry him.

No marriage is perfect; ours certainly wasn't. But we worked hard at it & loved each other intensely, fought passionately & felt deeply about the things that mattered most to both of us: God, our children & extended family, friends, music, living with integrity, kindness & generosity. Bobby was one of the gentlest most generous men I've ever known. Sometimes I think this world was not a kind enough place to be able to keep him here...I hope this blesses someone today....with tears & great love, Mimi

Message for 2008

When I was singing on New Years Eve in Columbia, SC with MOWpeeps: "Prepare... for what I'm about to unleash on the earth...", I saw an enormous banquet table. It was completely bare except for a perfectly white tablecloth covering it. It means a couple of things to me: the slate is not only wiped clean but it completely new, virginal, untouched . What God is about lay on the table is brand new, not yet seen, yet something completely delicious and worth every moment of waiting , suffering and persevering. (I have this thought over and over about the coming year: make no assumptions based on what we think we know or past experience but STAY OPEN.) It is untouched by human hands. HE alone will set this table before us, in the presence of our enemies no less! We can feast and revel in it. There is room for EVERYONE at this table and lastly: the table doesn't just represent what God is doing in the earth, but it also represents the human heart made new IN HIM and HE feasts there with us. Yum yum. It is a glorious thing and we are GLAAAAAAAAAAD !!!!!!!! Eph. 3:20 glory to Him because He is able to do such things. He is mighty and awesome ...wow. Love to you all from us